


even the sun can't shine as bright as you

by DruidChild06



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F, Friends to Lovers, It's about the tenderness, Light Angst, Memories, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-23
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2019-11-04 05:51:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17892731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DruidChild06/pseuds/DruidChild06
Summary: The Doctor plans on taking Yaz on a quick trip to Cardiff but as always, trouble manages to find them. Featuring the character development for Yaz and the Doctor that we all deserve!





	1. A handbook of leadership in policing

The Doctor stepped out of her TARDIS onto the damp streets of Sheffield, wrapping her scarf more tightly around her neck against the chill. A fine rain fell onto the tarmac like thousands of tiny knives and the Doctor wished, like she often did, that she was at home in the warmth of Gallifrey’s double suns. At the sound of her favourite human’s voice, she pushed the painful memories out of her head. She was on earth, her second home, and earth was brilliant. 

“Come on, Will, Liam. Just tell me one good thing about this shift, yeah? The leadership handbook says I should ask everyone that.” PC Yasmin Khan crossed her arms and fixed her colleagues with a pointed frown. She wasn’t in a good mood. Her face was numb from the rain, they’d had three separate incidences of public indecency to deal with (in the rain? Really? Sheffield’s ability to produce gross men seemingly out of the woodwork never failed to astonish her), and the other constables on her shift were NOT playing along with her attempts at developing her leadership skills. “Please? I’ll buy you a drink, yeah?” 

PC Will Griffiths rolled his eyes and stuffed his freezing hands under his armpits. “Yaz. It’s raining. Shift’s over, just go home, mate.” 

“Want a lift, Will?” PC Liam Crook slapped Will’s shoulder. 

“Ah, yeah, you’re a real one!” 

“All good. See ya tomorrow, Yaz…” the two turned away and began their trek down the street. Yasmin watched them go, stamping her wet boots and huffing in frustration. Even before she’d started travelling with the Doctor, Yaz had known she could do MORE. Reconciling petty neighbourhood disputes was all very well, but she knew she could impact so many more lives if someone would just give her a chance. So yesterday she’d purchased ‘A Handbook to Leadership in Policing,’ sure that if she became the effortless leader she knew she could be, the higher ups would HAVE to give her something cool and interesting to do. So far it wasn’t working. 

Discouraged, Yaz turned away from the bright lights of the police station and started the slow walk back to her family’s flat. 

Standing in the rain a short distance away, the Doctor had watched this short exchange feeling Yaz’s frustration. It must be hard enough for her favourite human to make it in a chauvinistic, male dominated workplace, but as well as that, she was bored. The Doctor could empathise with how awful that was – being bored felt like being slowly stomped to death under the hooves of Venusian slug-pigs. Maybe the trip she’d been planning on asking her friends to join her on would help. 

“Going my way?” she called out, unable to stop the grin that spread across her face as Yaz turned, surprised, and spotted her. The happiness was quickly replaced by a wave of grief and the words reminded her of another time, and another companion. She fought to keep the smile on her lips as Yaz bounded over to her, stopping about a foot away as she always did, as though she was scared of touching her friend. 

“Depends. Are you going somewhere warm?” Yaz asked her, grinning. 

“Weeell, I was thinking Cardiff, which, in November, is on average is 0.765 degrees Celsius warmer than Sheffield, so yes, you could say that.” The Doctor opened the door, her low level telepathy immediately sensing the feeling of longing and hunger that emananted from Yasmin as she saw the warm lights of the TARDIS interior. 

“I’ll make the tea,” said Yaz. 

Xxx 

Yaz cradled her asymmetrical orange mug in both hands, sitting on the stairs that led from the upper level of the TARDIS control room down to the controls. She was warm for the first time that day (thank goodness for the TARDIS’s endless supply of hot water and clean, comfortable clothes) and a feeling of happiness and wellbeing was finally beginning to seep into her heart, as it always did when she was anticipating a new adventure with the Doctor and her friends, Ryan and Graham. 

The Doctor had abandoned her coat and was humming a tuneless song as she fiddled with the various levers and switches, glancing every so often at Yaz and smiling. 

“Why Cardiff?” Yaz asked idly, aware of the sway of her friend’s hips as she dived and tapped in the endless dance of time travel. 

“Good question! Five points for Yasmin Khan!” The Doctor enthused, swivelling a screen and pushing a button. “See, Yaz, there’s this really useful rift in the fabric of time and space in Cardiff, perfect for cheering up my TARDIS when she’s feeling a bit run down. Thought we could eat some chips, ooh, d’you reckon they’d have those swirly ice creams with the chocolate sticking up out of it in Cardiff? I love those!” 

Yaz laughed. “I think they have those everywhere, Doctor.”

“Perfect!” The Doctor hummed in contentment, then sobered. “Last time I went to Cardiff I was with old friends. Was fun.” 

By this time, Yaz was used to the introspection and pained expression that appeared on the Doctor’s face whenever she spoke of the past, her family, or her old friends. It still sent a blade as sharp as the rain in Sheffield through her heart every time she witnessed it. She tried to distract the Doctor from her memories. “So, we gonna pick up the boys or what? Graham’s always up for some chips.” 

The Doctor nodded and shook off the thoughts, pressing one last button. “On our way now! Oh – hang on – that’s weird.” 

“What?” Yaz unfolded herself from her cozy position and walked up to the Doctor. She tried so hard not to touch her friend and failed, unable to stop herself putting a gentle palm against the Doctor’s shoulder. For a second, the Doctor flinched, before relaxing slightly into the touch. Yaz could still feel the tension in the Doctor’s muscles and cleared her throat, taking a step away. She was always longing to reach out and touch the Doctor – caress or hug or even – but she knew the tight boundaries her friend pulled around herself and respected them. 

The Doctor swallowed as Yaz pulled away and tried not to shout out “No!” She hadn’t allowed herself to be close to anybody in a long time, understanding too well the consequences of attachment. It hurt how close she was to letting go. But right now she had bigger problems. “Yaz, you know how you wanted to go somewhere warm?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Well, let’s just say you’re going to warm up soon? Because we’re headed directly towards the sun.”


	2. Not as bad as it seems (maybe)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the nice comments on chapter one! :) I miss team TARDIS and can't wait for the next season!!! Please note that I know almost nothing about this type of science so forgive the errors/scientific impossibility of this chapter.

The sound of china shattering on metal echoed through the TARDIS as Yaz dropped her mug of tea in horror. “WHAT?” she yelped. 

The Doctor frowned, the adorable indent in her forehead crumpling as she thought. She spared a quick, comforting smile at her friend. “No, it’s okay – not as bad as it sounds, I promise.” 

Yaz leapt up and began to pace the TARDIS. Even though she trusted the Doctor with her life, she could still feel her heart hammering in her chest. She tried to stop the panic from creeping into her voice as she asked, “Doctor…how can flying into the sun not be as bad as it sounds?” 

The Doctor flicked a switch and spun on her heel to beam at Yaz. “Another good question! Was I doing stars or points? Nevermind, you’re winning, that’s what matters! See, Yaz, what with global warming etcetera, you humans have to figure out a way of preventing earth burning up. In the 23rd century a team of international rocket scientist geniuses create a dark spot in the very core of the sun – a man made black hole, if you will – that sucks radiation down in an ever deepening spiral! The sun’s temperature is reduced, earth survives, plus there’s now a science laboratory on the sun! Fantastic, right?” 

Yaz swallowed, willing her heart to calm down, and tried to comprehend what the Doctor was telling her. “So…we’re headed for a 23rd century space station?” 

“Exactly. Well, not headed for anymore – we’re here.” In her excitement, the Doctor momentarily forgot her no-touching rule. She bounded up to Yaz and went to spin her to face the TARDIS doorway. An expression of…well, the Doctor didn’t quite know what – panic? - crossed Yaz’s face and the Doctor immediately let go and took a step back, feeling like she’d been burned. She tried for a smile, one that didn’t reach her eyes. Once again, she thought of Rose, who would have grabbed her hand and pulled her out the door, and something stabbed through both her hearts. 

“Ready to visit the 23rd century? After you, Yasmin Khan.” The Doctor squashed her pain back down into the corner of her brain she only visited in nightmares, and gestured to the door. Yaz, who had already turned away, nodded determinately and took a step towards the TARDIS doors and pushed them outwards. 

The first thing that hit them was the brightness. Sunlight flooded the TARDIS and swallowed every corner, biting into their wide  
open eyes and making both the Doctor and Yaz lift an arm to shield her face. It was like stepping into a lightbulb. 

“Doctor!” cried Yaz. “I can’t see anything.” 

Relief flooded the Doctor’s system as she heard the lack of animosity in Yaz’s voice. Forget the momentary wobble. They were back to Yaz-and-the-Doctor, two platonic friends who often saved each other’s lives but never, ever touched. Which was a normal way to be. Not weird at all. Definitely, totally, normal. “Not to worry, Yaz! I’ve got special sunglasses somewhere…hold on a moment.” 

Yaz shut her eyes and stood still in the warmth as the Doctor bounced off to find sunglasses. She was grateful for a moment alone, and from behind closed eyelids, the light was almost pleasant. A brightness that cleaned away the past. Just like she’d been taught in basic training, Yaz regulated her breathing. She hadn’t been expecting the Doctor to touch her earlier, even just on the shoulders, and she was sure the expression of panic had been completely visible on her countenance. It wasn’t that she was scared of the Doctor; the opposite, in fact. She was scared of how much she wasn’t scared of the Doctor. Of how much she was sure that if they finally touched, properly, a proper hug even, Yaz would never be able to stop touching her. It was all so much. 

Yaz jumped as she felt a presence close to her. “Doctor?” 

“Yep!” The Doctor lifted a pair of sunglasses and hesitated. Yasmin was an adult and perfectly capable of putting on her own glasses, but the Doctor craved that tiny, innocent seeming moment of tenderness. Giving into weakness, the Doctor unfolded the second pair of sunglasses and settled them on Yaz’s face, her thumb brushing the hair by Yaz’s forehead only slightly. She felt Yaz stop breathing and guilt flooded her, brighter than the sunlight outside. She stepped backwards. 

“All done!” she exclaimed. “You can open your eyes now, Yaz!” 

The dark sunglasses hid Yaz’s eyes. The Doctor settled her hands in her pockets and nodded towards the open TARDIS doors. “Ready for an adventure?” 

Yaz let herself fall into the familiar routine of adventure, pretending she wasn’t still thinking about the Doctor’s thumb on her face. “Always!” she said. 

Outside the TARDIS, metallic-looking walls apparently did little to stop the heat and light of the sun breaking into the space station. Yaz felt sweat begin to drip down the back of her shirt. She lifted a hand to wipe at her forehead. The Doctor clocked her movement and rummaged in her seemingly endless pockets to pull out a bottle of water and handed it to Yaz. 

“The technology here is phenomenal,” she enthused, “Outside it’s 15 million degrees Celsius but with the layers of 23rd century laser technology and offworld mineral building supplies in here it’s only 40 degrees!” 

“Amazing,” Yaz agreed unenthusiastically. 40 degrees was still much too hot, in her personal opinion. She gulped at the water, grateful for its coolness alleviating her dry mouth, and assessed her surroundings. They seemed to have landed at the end of some kind of long corridor which stretched out before them for perhaps 50 metres. At the far end, Yaz could see a round metal door. 

“Doctor, we should head for the door, see who else is here –“ Yaz began, then stopped as she saw the wistful, hurt expression on the Doctor’s face. Her friend was looking upwards into the shafts of light falling through the corridor, mouth open and twisted at the corner as though in pain. 

“It reminds me of home,” the Doctor said very quietly, the excitement of moments ago all gone. She clenched her fists and then let go, allowing her hands to dangle helplessly at her sides. Yaz felt a sudden, desperate impulse to reach for them, hold tight and squeeze and never let go. She felt frozen by the Doctor’s pain. 

Before either of them could speak again, the violent, high pitched sound of an alarm split their surroundings. The sad expression on the Doctor’s face disappeared instantly, replaced by one of concern. A loud voice spoke from above them. 

“This is a message for the invaders in the South corridor. You have three minutes to hand yourselves over. If you fail to do so, the South corridor will be incinerated.”


End file.
